―We got to carve it up in such a way that it doesn’t start a war, Vlad. We cut off most of their weapons, but we got to give Z. something.
―Well, I know that. But, like you, I won’t permit that scumbag to join NATO. The threat to peace then blows up tenfold, and I won’t fight all of Europe.
I’d set him up with a puppet government, like we did years ago in Yugoslavia. We’ll divide up the fucking country whether he likes it or not.
―He’s not gonna agree to that, Vlad. I offered him a great deal to take some of his rare-earth minerals. He said no. I told him no to entering NATO. He didn’t like that. Anyway, give him back some of that limited area you guys control where you’re taking a beating from their drones anyway. A small price to pay for peace and he’ll buy into that. Z. is already talking about giving up some of that Kursk land you bitched about when he beat up on you. I’ll push him to accept.
―I still want to throw some tactical nukes at him. Historically, this is all Russia’s territory, and he knows it. You don’t know our history, Don.
―Well, the Western world, meaning the pansies running NATO, are a bunch of elite snobs but they would never allow that, Vlad. Moscow would be in ashes. The trick is to make him an offer he can’t refuse. You keep your hard-won territory (you didn’t know what a meat-grinder you were getting into, did you?) and throw some money and resources at him.
―Let’s go eat. I need some vodka.
Hah! Funny, but the sad part is how close it is to true.