The funeral and the obsequies were beyond belief. When they carved open Trump’s corpulent body, out popped Stephen Miller, angry, crying, spewing venom about minorities. Who knew the president was carrying such a depraved creature? Apparently the blue wave did him in, fomenting a stroke, the doctors said, due to his uncontrolled rage over the election results.
“Trump was never able to face reality,” said Dr. X, “and strokes are the fate of many tyrants. Look at these famous turd brains: Josef Stalin, Antonio Salazar, Ferdinand Marcos.”
As Miller grew up he began to relish his role as Chief Sycophant and Trump Zealot:
“Let me tell you, if it wasn’t for President Trump, the United States of America would not exist right now. This man saved America,” Miller declared….Just days after Republicans suffered one of their most devastating electoral defeats, Miller insisted that Trump “saved the Republican Party from the ash heap of history and has made it stronger, more popular, and more resilient than ever before. He faced down life in prison for us.”
Republicans are not pleased with this new Chief of Staff. And neither is the commentariat. David Rothkopf:
His heavy-handed “management style” combined with his general odiousness and a personality that suggests his childhood was filled with endless hours pulling the legs off of small insects have led those with direct contact with him to call him “impossible.” One senior official from the first Trump administration described him to me as “the biggest asshole I have ever met.”
Perhaps what finally killed the Donald was not the blue wave but giving birth to his devoted offspring.