Tag: Ismail Haniyeh

• • Your “Check Engine” light is on.

• • Do cat ladies wear cat suits?

• • Aren’t you going to Ismail Haniyeh’s funeral?

• • She “all of a sudden decided to become a Black person.”

• • “Welcome to the ‘Underconsumption Core’ TikTok Trend—Dog Owner Edition” (Newsweek)

• • Next time you’re in Paris, go for a swim in the Seine.

• • Reporter Evan Gershkovich: “The food was really good.”

• • Mingus to a pushy nightclub patron: “Your breath stinks. Get away from me.”

• • If Trump had been wearing ear muffs. . .

• • Have some more of this Jell-O apricot salad.

• • Overheard: “Your midlife crisis don’t mean shit to me.”

• • A Jewish Vice President?. . . Talk to your doctor.